you have got to be kidding me

so the other night I was leaving an event and decided to take the bus home. call me crazy if you wish, but I love taking the bus. yes I know it takes longer than most modes of transportation (sometimes including walking), but I would much rather be able to look at things rather than being stuck underground. now a post about buses probably does not sound too exciting - but wait til you hear this story.

I get on the bus at a stop (cannot recall which one, but it is not really pertinent to the story). the stop was before the light. the bus stopped, people got off and people got on. we then left the stop, got to the light and had to wait because it was red. I am sitting in the front and next thing I know this guy in a wheelchair comes racing through the crosswalk, screaming and PARKS HIMSELF RIGHT IN FRONT OF THE BUS! I kid you not - he stopped his wheelchair right in front of the bus so we could not move. and we legit sat there for about 20 minutes waiting for this guy to move.

some pedestrian even tried talking the guy out from in front of the bus. but Mr. Crazy kept screaming something about the bus driver left him on purpose. (I don't necessarily think that was the case, but then again I wasn't the one parked in front of a bus). there was even a point where the guy took his bottle of soda and chucked it at the windshield. I can't imagine how hard it must have been for the bus driver later to clean off sticky coca-cola. one passenger was genius enough to call the cops. the showed up a bit later and literally as soon as they came he moved out from in front of the bus.

the best part of it all - while he was "defiantly" parked in front of the bus, THREE other buses passed that he could have easily taken instead.

even though I was frustrated at the time (I really just wanted to get home), it sure made for an awesome story. only in New York right?
(this wasn't exactly the image I was going for, but it was the closest I could find)

why yes, of course my night doesn't start til midnight on a weekday

So last night was the One Man Boy Band's 21st birthday.

that should give you an idea of what the night was like right there.

the night started with a little pre-gaming action at The Instigator's place and Fabulous and her Plus One joined us as well. every good night should start with a little bit of bubbly - so we did just that. White Zinfandel Champagne (I never knew there was such a thing) mixed with Strawberry Champagne = amazing. (and an amazing headache the next day too) so we finally leave the apartment at about 12:30 (the party did not start until midnight), leave Plus One on the corner and hop in a cab and head to Kiss & Fly (anyone ever heard of it? because I sure haven't). it was your typical Meatpacking District club, complete with douchbags and trashy B&T girls.

when we get there the bouncer starts looking at me weird and asking me if I was with the other two, because apparently I was messing up the "chemistry" of the group. interesting. Fabulous was, well, fabulous in that she basically told the guy that I was their best friend and she didn't appreciate his remarks, he was being very rude, we were there for a friend's birthday, on the list and to just let us in. it was amazing. the adventure wasn't over yet. we get inside and the guy there is telling us it's $5 to get. I guess there goes the point of putting names on a list. we didn't know quite what to do because none of us had cash on us. so after 30 seconds of standing there he makes the comment "if you can't afford it then you can leave." I really wanted to tell him - son, I make more than you do in a year so don't talk to me about not being able to afford it, I just didn't have the $5 on me at the moment. he even tries telling us that it is a reduced cover and that it is normally $25 to get in. really? you are in Meatpacking. and it's already about 1 in the morning by now. and it's a Wednesday night. you aren't that special to be charging $25 covers...

but we wanted to see the One Man Boy Band, so Fabulous decides to go to the ATM that they conveniently have there and take out money to get us all in. and we still had one more obstacle to go. apparently at this place you HAVE to check your coat. the next bouncer wouldn't let us through without checking our coats. and the coat check was $3 each. and you couldn't put two coats on the same hanger (lame). well since we only had a $5 bill left, Fabulous hung up hers (because it was bigger) and the Instigator and I just put our small jackets in Fabulous' purse.

finally we made it in the club. no more obstacles (unless you count the drunken people mingling about). make it to the middle of the place and FINALLY see the One Man Boy Band. all the adventures before that was worth it right there. the One Man Boy Band is an amazing person and being able to help him celebrate his 21st birthday (it only happens once) was worth everything that night.

so we dance. and dance. and dance. and the liquor is flowing (I tried to be a good girl since I had to work the next day). of course there is a fight - boys cannot seem to control there testosterone. but then everyone goes back to dancing. they even played Frank Sinatra's "New York, New York" and EVERYONE in the place was singing it. :) and later the One Man Boy Band kind of shoves me to dance with his friend - a Chuck Bass look-a-like (almost. it was dark - cut me some slack). well it turns out Chuck Bass is a great dancer. :)

oh, and quite randomly - two members of the Black Eyed Peas showed up. so of course the DJ played their songs (again, because we had already heard them by this time of the night) and the guys grabbed the mics and started singing along. really? I already know what you sound like when you sing, so you just singing over the lyrics that you've already sung is not that big of deal.


the night eventually comes to a close because it was 3:30 in the morning and all of us had our big girl jobs the next day. so we said goodbye to One Man Boy Band (I said goodbye to Chuck Bass) and we left. when we get outside I discover that Fabulous had a slight altercation with a boy who must have thought he was the Maharaja of India or something. not sure of the exact story, but it essentially went like this:

Maharaja grabs Fabulous to dance.
Fabulous says no (I think it was more in of the form of body language (i.e. pulling her arm away) rather than using actual words).
Maharaja calls Fabulous bitch.
repeats the name.
over.
and over.
and over.
interspersed throughout "bitch" he claims that he will throw her out of the club.
somehow gets bouncer to come over.
bouncer basically just stands there, cannot believe what is going on and finally leaves.
it may have been at this point that the Maharaja realizes he wasn't going to win, with either Fabulous or the bouncer so he gave up.

so Fabulous hops on the subway and the Instigator and I get in a cab and we all head home. at 4 in the morning. works starts at 9 in the morning. awesome.







but the night was completely worth it. ;)